When you search love in the KJV of the Bible, you will find there are over 300 hits referring to love in scripture.  Did you know love is a commandment? We are commanded to love one another by Jesus Himself. He is quoted saying this four times in the book of John.  This is repeated by the Apostle Paul in a multitude of his writings. Peter confirms it in his book and John confirms it twice more in 1 John and 2 John.  

Many of us are in search of feelings and love is no exception. When we lose the feeling of love, we tend to think all hope is lost. This is especially true in our relationships. However, love is not a feeling, it is a choice. It requires action and commitment. I think it is highly important that we understand this fact. Half of the marriages in the United States are failing. A lot of times, it is due to feelings that we seek. The newness of any relationship will eventually die down. Love is about working together and thinking of others instead of just ourselves.

 When we make a choice to love, we are choosing to change the direction of our thoughts. When we make love a habit, our brain will begin developing this habit and love will come with ease.  In psychology, this is an aspect you call behaviorism. If we stay committed to loving acts and do them frequently, it will begin to come naturally. For a short period of time, we may have difficulty showing love. Unfortunately, it seems to be easier to show negative emotions than positive ones. This is why it is vital you choose to change your mindset.

Anytime a negative thought comes into your mind, try to develop a habit of thinking before you speak. Is what you are saying beneficial? If it is not, then choose a different direction. There are times that we need to show a negative reaction (example: kids misbehaving). More times than not, it is better for us not to react.

 Think of all the times people have shown us love.  Now, think of all the times people have told us things we will never forget like: You will never succeed, you are worthless and so on.  Do you think the negative things people have said had any positive impact on you at all? Think of the things you have said negatively to others.  Remember, our tongues can pierce people. It leaves scars on lives. We all tend to remember the negative more than we do the positive. This is why it is important for us to remember to act on love and not react to emotions.

In the Christian realm, it is highly important we show love. This is what draws people to Christ. It gets people interested. God really needs us to be the light of this world for His sake. Look at how crazy things are getting? We have gotten a bad wrap lately. Let’s be honest, some of it is deserved. I have viewed countless videos and messages where Christians are arguing instead of showing others love.  We must remember one purpose that all of us have: To be the light and bring people to Christ. It is a commandment and our duty. Take a look at Jesus’s life here on Earth. He was up against people who were constantly bringing him down. The Sadducees and Pharisees were at His throat on a daily basis. He did not let them stop His mission, He kept pressing forward, and He continued to show love. Jesus tells us we should lead by His example. Jesus showed love through words and actions. Any time you get an opportunity to show love, you should do it.

Love is an example we set for our children and others around us. When we handle things out of love, people take note. We want our children to be loving and kind human beings. We are the first to show them this through our actions. Anyone working with children has a wonderful opportunity to show them how to react with love.

If we treat love as a decision and start acting on that choice, our lives will become more positive than ever before. We will begin to see a shift in our personalities for the better. Our relationships will flourish with others and with God. It is easier for others to trust a loving and kind person.

If we do not act on love, who will? Will any souls be won to Christ by acting on anything other than love? As difficult as this can be, we must do our best to start taking love seriously.  Any time we directly disobey God’s commands, we are vulnerable to problems. Choose to be overwhelmed with love from this point forward. This world is in desperate need of our decision to love.

Have you made a decision to know and grow with God?  I assure you he is the best therapy you will ever need.  

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Categories: Self help


I am a Christian writer with a BA in Psychology and a certification in Family Studies. My goal is to help others find balance in their lives. I use Biblical and psychological perspectives and believe if we have a willingness and desire to change, we can for the better.

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